Embrace grieving as a healthy process
Grief is a normal, natural, and healthy response to different types of loss. Grieving is a process of fully experiencing your emotions without judgement. It can get ugly, but that's OK.
Ride the rollercoaster
Grief has a mind of its own. You never quite know what emotions are going to show up. This can be incredibly intimidating and uncomfortable. Staying in check with yourself and your emotions during this process helps you move through the anguish and agony, and helps you arrive at acceptance and peace. Remember, grief isn't all sadness either. There are often times of happiness and laughter during the process too.
Stay with it
There is no right way to grieve. Everybody responds to loss differently. The impact of the loss can vary greatly. The point is to make a conscious effort to feel it out.
First, check in with your body.
Jot down how you've been feeling since the loss. Are you tense or tight in any specific areas of your body? Where? Are you full of anger or rage? If so, what are you angry about? Do you just want to escape the world and hide out? How does that serve you? Are you always on the verge of tears? Jot it all down. The more expressive you can be, the more clarity you'll have on what your emotions are and how to get through them.
Do something about it
If you're feeling tense in your body, ask yourself what your body needs and then give it to yourself, no questions asked. Maybe it's a hot bath or shower to soothe your muscles? A massage to work out the tension? Maybe it's just some rest and relaxation. If you're feeling anger, let it out. Maybe you feel like you're always on the verge of tears. Cry one of those hearty, child-like cries. More likely than not, you will feel some sense of relief, even if the relief doesn’t have long-term effects.
If you keep checking in with yourself and allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling, and act on those feelings with kindness and compassion, the pain will eventually dissipate.
And don't forget to celebrate too. Take time to laugh and remember the positive experiences you had. Reminisce with others about the good times, the ridiculous times, the absurd times. If you are grieving a person, reminisce on their physical mannerism, their quirks, or their unique expressions.
Grief is a very normal response to loss. It's important to allow your emotions to come to the surface, to feel them thoroughly, and to remain gentle and compassionate with yourself and your process. Grief can be short-lived or it can last a while. The important thing is to remain free of self-judgement as you work though the many unexpected emotions that loss brings out.